current brain spew

6/23/2009

this summer has been tough.
probably because i am not on a mission trip, im not in a different country, im not doing anything spectacular... i´m just at home.

i knew from the get go that it was going to be a difficult three months, but everything doesn´t set in until you´re in the midst of everything. so here i am, in the midst of everything, feeling like i´m doing nothing but i´m actaully overwhelmed by everything.

i start to think about the sacrifices i need to make... and deep down i know that should make those sacrifices with a humble spirit... but that´s certainly not the case. i fight for what i know i have to give up instead of just surrendering it.

sometimes i feel sort of alone, i´m around a ton of people everyday, but i just don´t really like them enough to call them my friends. i get sick of people so easily and i don´t know why... it´s stupid. so i start to isolate myself into my dark pit of laziness, self pity, and depression.

i guess i´ve been pretty randomly blunt... this is just what i´m struggling with right now, but i know that this too shall pass.


.. your grace has overwhelmed my brokenness...